


Is Johnny Bravo Gay or European?

by Tiffanychan123



Category: Cartoon Network, Johnny Bravo (Cartoon), Samurai Jack (Cartoon)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-12-14 20:15:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11790642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tiffanychan123/pseuds/Tiffanychan123
Summary: Due to not dating Velma that much as he used to, some of Cartoon Network's characters devise a trial to find out what the heck has been going on with Johnny Bravo's relationship with Velma lately.





	Is Johnny Bravo Gay or European?

**Author's Note:**

> This is loosely based off of the song from Legally Blonde, Gay or European.

"Can Mr. Bravo come to the stand!" Harvey Birdman called.

  
Johnny Bravo walked up to the podium in front of Harvey. The reason they were having this trial so to speak, and why Harvey Birdman is the judge. And yes I am not joking.. Is because of a possible incedent with Velma shortly after one of her mysteries, Velma had a date planned with Johnny..But he never came, Johnny later didn't spend as much time with Velma as he used to, the people of Cartoon Network weren't sure what he was up to, but rest assure, they wanted to know what the heck he was up to...And the reason Harvey wanted to be the judge for the trial...It was because...He just wanted to.

* * *

  
"Were right now to discuss what's going on recently with you, Mr. Bravo and Miss. Dinkley's possible relationship, more pacfically why aren't you dating as much as you used to!"

  
Meanwhile in the audience, Bubbles thought of something she wanted to say out loud, but it might feel wierd coming out of her mouth, but she had to...She freaking had to...  
Bubbles then stood up from the left side of the audience, pointed at Johnny Bravo, and said out loud...

* * *

  
"THERE RIGHT THERE!"  
Harvey's eyes widened, along with a few other members of the audience. Which included Cartoon Network characters, mainly characters from classic show's and Hanna Barbera cartoons, but they were some characters from new show's though.  
"Look at that tan, well tinted skin, look at the killer shape he's in, look at that slightly stubbly chin, oh please, he's gay, totally gay!" she sang.  
On the right side of the audience, Dexter stood up and sang as well.  
"I'm not about to celebrate, every trait could indicate, a totally straight expatriate, this guy's not gay, I say not gay!" he then sat down again, same with Bubbles.  
"Excuse me you two, no singing in court!" Harvey exclaimed.  
Meanwhile in the audience however a few people on both the left and the right started whispering to each other.  
"That is the elephant in the room, well, is it relevant to assume that a man who wears perfume is automatically medically fay?"  
Fred looked at Johnny as pulled out a comb from his pocket to well..Comb his hair with, his eyes widened, he then leaned near Daphne and said.  
"But look at his quoft and crispy locks!" he pointed at Johnny's hair.  
Daphne, who had one of her hand puppets of herself, then leaned near Velma and said.  
"Look at his silk translucent socks!"  
Harvey then stood up from his seat and for some reason started to sing.  
"There's the eternal paradox. Look what we're seeing." he sang.  
Blossom flew over from her seat and leaned over to Harvey.  
"What're we seeing."  
"Is he gay!" Harvey sang.  
Bubbles sprang up from her chair and exclaimed.  
"Of course he's gay!!"  
"Or European!"  
Bubbles sat back down, the same went for Blossom.  
"OOooohhh." The audience went.  
The audience thought it over for a few seconds, then some members of the audience whispered to each other saying.  
"Gay or European, it's hard to gaurantee, is he gay, or European."  
"Well hey don't look at me!" Eddy then exclaimed.  
"You see they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports. They play peculiar sports" Blossom sang, she was then joined in by other Hanna Barbera characters. "In shiny shirts and tiny shorts!"  
Then the audience sang.  
"Gay or European. The answer could take weeks. They will say things like "ciao bella" while they kiss you on both cheeks."  
Bubbles then crossed her arms in a huff.  
"Oh please."  
"Gay or European? So many shades of gray."  
Robin then stood up from his seat and said.  
"Depending on the time of day Snagglepuss goes either way."  
"Hey!" Snagglepuss exclaimed in a huff.  
"Is he gay or European? Or-"  
"THERE RIGHT THERE!" Mandy interrupted angrily. "Look at that condescending smirk, seen on every guy at work, that is a metro-hetero jerk, that guy's not gay I say, NO WAY!"  
Garnet left the Courtroom to go to the bathroom for a few minutes.  
"That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to presume, that a hottie in that costume"  
"He's automatically, radically!" Bubbles sang.  
"Ironically, cronically." Harvey sang.  
"Scurtinly, curtainly." Mandy sang.  
"Genetically, netically!" Robin sang.  
Then the audience and Harvey stood up and sang.  
"Gay! Officially Gay! Officially Gay, Gay, Gay, Gay!"  
When Garnet got back from the bathroom, Johnny ran over to her to possibly flirt on her.  
"DAMMIT!" The rest of them shouted. "Gay or European."  
"So stylish and relaxed..." Harvey said.  
"Is he gay or European?" The crowd replied.  
"I think his chest is waxed."  
"But they bring their boys up different there It's culturally diverse." Blossom sang.  
Bubbles then replied with.  
"It's not a fashion curse."  
"If he wears a kilt or bears a purse." One of the crowd members stood up, he was a fat orange haired man with a kilt. He looked a little bit like a cat. "OI!"  
"Gay or European? I still can't crack the code."  
"Yet his voice is so hypnotic but his shoes are pointy toed." Bunny replied.  
"Huh...Gay or European? So many shades of gray!"  
Dexter's mom then stood up from her seat.  
"And if he turns out straight, I'm free, at eight on Saturday!"  
"Is he gay or European? Gay or european? Gay or Euro-"  
"Wait a minute!" Robin exclaimed. "Your honor. Give me a chance to crack this guy, I have an idea I like to try.."  
"The floor is yours..." Harvey replied. Robin got out of his seat in the audience and walked over to Johnny.  
"So...Mr. Mess O Blues. This relationship with Miss. Dinkley has been going on for?"  
"Uh..Imma say, a few years." Johnny replied.  
"And your first name again is?" Robin replied back.  
"Johnny."  
"And your boyfriends name is?"  
"Jack."  
The audience gasped. Johnny was also a little bit embarrased.  
"Oh wait, sorry, I misunderstood that. You said boyfriend, I actually thought best friend, Jack is my best friend..."  
Then, suddenly, a black haired man in a white robe, came walking through the doors of the courtroom and said.  
"You bastard!" The audience's eyes widened. "You lying bastard!" Harvey was surprised by this, Robin rubbed his eyes, and Johnny took off his glasses revealing two black beady eyes.  
Jack breathed in and out, and then said. "That's it...I'm not making it a secret anymore...Everyone....I have a big announcement! This man is gay! Not European."  
The audience gasped. "WHOA!"  
"Not kidding in this case, you've got to stop your being, a completely closet case! Though Johnny loves his dating. No matter what he says, he is in fact a guy who sometimes goes both ways. You are so gay. You big parfait! You flaming boy in cabaret!!"  
"I'm straight!!" Johnny exclaimed blushing as a result.  
Jack smirked. "You were not yesterday...And if I may, I'm proud to say, he's gay!"  
"Not European!" The crowd sang.  
"He's gay!"  
"Not European"  
"He's gay!"  
"Not European but gay!!"  
Johnny blushed a bit more and exclaimed.  
"I'll admit I'm kinda gay..."  
"HORRAY!!!" The crowd cheered with Johnny and Jack hugging each other while they were cheering..


End file.
